Waking up each morning is one of the worst parts of my day to day life. It's better when Steve is with me - cuddles on tap, a cuppa if I want one, and if necessary he'll give me any physical help I need to get to the bathroom and so on. The man is an angel. But most of the time, like today, I'm on my own.
The first thing that courses through my mind each morning is a large and intense level of all-over muscular pain. I have to spend a while doing breathing techniques while concentrating on each set of muscles to relax them. It's usually a while before I even have enough mobility to lever myself into a sitting position and take a painkiller.
But I sleep about 10 hours at night. What do you think is preying on my mind as I get to grips with the pain levels? I have to journey the two metres to the bathroom. While I don't intend to go into huge detail, it can be tricky to do relaxation and breathing when there are other more urgent matters pressing for attention...
Next up is to work out what body parts I have control of. Today is not a *bad* day, but a very annoying one.
I'm missing most of my left leg right now. That's not too much of a problem. It's still there, I can see it's still there, I just can't happen to feel it or really move it this morning. So I can either crawl the two metres to the bathroom, dragging the leg, or I can walk it by kind of throwing my leg forward from the hip and then moving the rest of me. ME involves balance problems though, and I don't feel like bruising myself yet today, so I opted for crawling, so now my knees are all red.
I'm also missing my right thumb, and if anything that's worse. Seriously, it's not even like having your thumb tied to the rest of your hand, cos then it would be out of the way. No, it's dragging on the keyboard and the laptop trackpad and getting in the way, and I'm having to try and do stuff left-handed. My typing is shot, picking things up is an exercise in frustration, and I know that when it comes back it'll be with HARSH pins and needles.
It's a beautiful day outside, which I can't partake in yet because I'm not opening the curtains until I have clothes on and I have enough trouble putting clothes on with two working hands with opposable thumbs, and grumble grumble grumble grumble RANT!
I have this idea about, when I live with Steve, how I could make him sandwiches to take to work in the morning like a little wifelet.
I also have this idea about having a board and a loaf of bread and a little portable fridge and a butterknife in the wardrobe, so that I would have half a hope in hell of accomplishing sandwiches before he actually had to leave for work...